It's all right, cause I'm saved by the bell. (da-nuh-da-na-nuh-nuh!)

I think it's only fair to be honest and tell you that the thing occupying the bulk of my downtime is not crafting, or reading, or intelligent conversations or baking. No. It's "Saved by the Bell". Yes, that classic Saturday morning show about floating through high school in the hip, happenin' nineties that is now available to the wide world via the magical cave of procrastination known as Netflix. I'm on Season 4 and I've only been at it for a week. I don't know whether to be impressed or mortified.

Either way, I love it. And I'm realizing with every twenty-minute episode how much this sublime showcase of teen life has impacted our current society. And so I present to you: The Things That Originated With Saved By The Bell.

The original frat tank: A.C. Slater. I mean his were tighter than the typical Greek member of 2012 prefers, but bicep-revealing tanks in a rainbow of hues are as cool now as they were when Mario Lopez had a mullet-fro.

The original hipster: Tori Spelling guest starring as Screech's nerdy lady friend, Violet. Seriously, y'all, my mind was blown on, like, three different levels when I 1) recognized Tori Spelling and 2) saw that she was wearing a dress that is totally vintage hipster-chic by today's standards and could ABSOLUTELY be hanging in the Urban Outfitters store window right now.

The original "Glee": Oh it's true. I took away all of Ryan Murphey's creativity points for "Glee" after I watched the Season 4 episode aptly entitled "The Glee Club" in which a group of attractive jocks (the show regulars) join a sad group of nerds (the glee club) and they magically find one nerdy break-out star (Rachel Berry... I mean Tori Spelling) and THEY WIN NATIONALS THE ALL-CITY SING!

The original Bella Swan: Kelly Kapowski. Maybe this is an unfair accusation, but Kel-girl spends at least two seasons moaning about how she can't pick between Slater and Zack. I'M OVER IT, KELLY. Granted, neither of the boys are mythical creatures, but Kelly cinches the comparison with a K. Stu-esque lack of personality and long brown hair. Come on. Try to tell me I'm wrong.

The original Louis Stephens: Screech Powers. Please tell me to my face that the guys at Disney  (who, interestingly, owned the rights to SBTB for a season or two)  didn't all but carbon copy Shia LeBouf's "Even Stephens" character from good old Screech. They even kind of dressed the same. And had the same hair. And made nerdy losers seem like the most adorable creatures on the planet.

The original giant bow in your hair (though you are not, in fact, six): Jessie Spano. Headbands, bows, giant flowers, she's got 'em. And she makes them look effortlessly classy. I am incredibly impressed. Well done, Miss Spano. (She also rocks the high-waisted jeans like a p-r-o. Jealous.)

The original Gossip Girl: Lisa Turtle. Except she's way nicer, way more lovable, and way less Michelle Trachtenberg. Still, Lisa knows everything (see the KKTY episode) and uses her power when necessary (see the 1-900 episode). Oh, and she's a fabulous dresser.

The original (and only) love of my life: Zack Morris. I die. I also ignore the fact that I'm basically in love with a sixteen-year-old nineties heartthrob who is now approaching 40 and is probably way less attractive than he was as a Bayside Tiger. But... he's just... so cute. And sassy. And perfect. So, if you're not a tall, skinny troublemaker with perfectly coiffed blonde hair and a wink that knocks the ladies off their feet, don't bother knocking on my door.

On panicking, art and baristas.

Oh, sweet, sweet fall. This morning I am sitting on the back deck wrapped in a Snuggie (like a star, thanks) enjoying an actual chill in the air. Hello, life, you are perfect today.

So this week brought with it a panic attack, a new book, art and a job. The latter three are utterly ideal, the first less so.

1) Panic attack. I never do anything halfsies. I'm definitely more of an all-or-nothing breed of human, especially when it comes to any kind of emotional state. This week, that took form in a super subtle (but altogether time consuming) I-don't-have-a-plan-WHAT-IS-MY-LIFE?! nervous breakdown. Okay, I'm exaggerating. It wasn't a breakdown. But I'm trying this new thing where I, you know, check in with God and let Him fix me, which (let me tell you) is turning out to be no joyride. I mean bring on the life lessons and changes of heart, Big Guy, but this road is bumpy and I will need plenty of help.

2) New Book. To offset the panic, I got a treat. My friend Lexie mentioned last week that I remind her of Catherine Morland, the heroine of Northanger Abbey. I figured I might as well meet my novel doppleganger, and I had a giftcard to Barne's and Noble anyway, so I went to pick up the prettiest copy available and am deliciously excited to curl up with tea and get lost for the next few weeks.

3) Art. If we are being 100% honest, we can all admit that Kansas City is not the most hip location on the planet. I mean, it's the midwest. HOWEVER. There are hip things about Kansas City, and I was certainly a part of them last night. ie: First Fridays, Westport art show, and McCoy's. Which basically translates to: art galleries, free wine, live music, local art vendors, lots of hipsters, raspberry beer, and a few more hipsters.

4) A job. More specifically, a job that makes the very short list of "Dream Jobs", which makes it freaking awesome. Yes, friends, I am going to be a barista at a KC-based coffee joint and it will be the bomb. I am legitimately dying of excitement. Because, really, baristas are the coolest people. Right? They are always peppy, always kind, always give you coffee. Seriously. The best. To be part of that group of top-notch individuals makes me giddy. Come get coffee from me.

Top Ten Ways to Make Fall Festive

HAPPY SEPTEMBER, FRIENDS!  (A shout out to those of you who are boarding the Hogwarts Express today, or wish you were).  While it's true that the official first day of fall is a few weeks away, I like to get the season started as early as possible. Fall is, by far, the most anticipated season in my book. Isn't it true that people start daydreaming about scarves, sweaters and Pumpkin Spice Lattes in, like, August? Fall is the bomb. And, though busier than summer (unless you are, as I am, a super chill post-grad), there are ways to enjoy the season to the absolute fullest. For example:

1) Find a favorite coffee shop. As it begins to get colder, you will need to know where to go for any of the following activities: early morning latte, afternoon latte, dinner latte, coffee date, study corner.

2) Discover some fall jamz. Every season needs a playlist. For fall, try something chill and artsy. Mumford and Sons is always an option, but my favorite rainy/cold/snowy day music option is good old Frank Sinatra. Also Irish music. Weird?

3) Procure, by whatever means necessary, the perfect pair of jeans. I don't know about the more manly gender, but as a lady, finding great jeans is akin to hunting down a needle in a haystack in a snowstorm while a rock concert is going on. But some rockin' denim that will last you for the next six months is invaluable. You will wear them all the time, and the better you feel in them, the more it will show.

4) Go to something crazy, like Irish Fest. Fall festivals are the greatest. Google fall events in your city and pick a couple to check out. My personal favorites from the last few years have been the Irish Fest (Okay, I actually haven't gone yet but I plan to) and Sock it to Satan (real talk: I went. It was the greatest Halloween-meets-Jesus church event in the history of the world).

5) That Pinterest craft you put off all summer? Yeah, do that. Now is the time, folks. Carpe diem.

6) The PUMPKIN PATCH. The pumpkin patch has it all: an ideal photo shoot location, probably a hayride, definitely pumpkins. Hello, a perfect Saturday of family bonding.

7) Make a list of your favorite fall soups. Post it on the fridge for easy reference, then use it often. Yum. Try at least three new recipes this fall, more if you're feeling like June Cleaver.

8) Rake leaves with your best friends. It was a chore when we were kids, but now it's freaking fun. Make it happen. Drink tea afterwards. Leaf pile optional.

9) Pick a really killer devotional. It's fall... the time of schedules and checklists. Make daily JC-time part of that. Because lattes and Jesus is the closest thing to perfection on this side of the sun.

10) Cuddle up in a giant sweater. Have you ever spent the morning on the couch reading or knitting or just looking out the window? Best. Fall. Activity. Ever.

Well there it is, friends. Happy Saturday, Happy Fall, Happy Life.